I am laughing to myself as I read all these entries. They are ALL so true of the brainwashing division I worked in too for a whole year of my precious young life!! Only now am I actually realising that the smaller details of my experience are actually going on in EVERY Cobra office there is.
I suppose this is a sign to me that I am still slightly brainwashed a year on!!
To anyone reading this, please read the other entries, I'll not repeat the details but will certainly back up all of these horror stories.
The bottom line is quite simple - COBRA IS A CULT. A very very clever one at that. Whereas any other cult you read about involves religion in one way or another - be it a superior being or little green men - Cobra's religion is the very one that all of us job hunters worship the most - MONEY.
I used to go to all the rallies were we'd be told that all the 'neg-heads' in the outside world (non-cobra) thought Cobra was a cult.
"But we're not a cult. And we all know that don't we? "
"I said don't we? " - to which the 2, 000 gathering suited-up worshippers would reply NO in a simultaneous drone.
But we were very happy and relieved to think that we weren't a cult. Deep down I now realise that I always suspected I was in a cult.
What do cults do? They brainwash all their followers to believe and think they way the cult LEADERS do. (except cobra go that one step further and call them our OWNERS!!!)
They manipulate your mind to their benefit.
When I worked there for 80 hours a week for a year I didn't care that I was making good money 1 week, bad money the next, never seeing my family, friends, or girlfriend, that cobra was my whole life. This was because I watched the one new owner being promoted to ownership within 7 months. This actually is true. The once-nice David Esler flew through the rapid advancement management program. The fact that it fell down around him pretty quickly was quickly covered up by the brainwasher and we all still believed. (although he is still operating under the pretence that everything is going swimmingly) I knew that all I had to do was put up with a few more months of absolute hell and suddenly all my problems would be over, and my lifes ambitions would be realised when I was made owner and reaped the rewards of my hard work. After all, my owner was 'only reaping the benefits now from all her hard work on the field'.
Lies Lies Lies Lies Lies. I'm glad I can laugh about it all now with my fellow ex-cobra-ites. Its only when you come out and look back in that you surprise yourself with every thought of the Cobra religion... my God did i actually do that?
I can only apologise to all of my 'OBs' who I took out and bought you lunch to invest in my business, and who subsequently I tried to brainwash for my benefit too. I'm glad I have no legacies of team members left there now, otherwise the guilt would be too much.
One thing I will say is that it gave me good experience, and although I say that will never happen to me again, I always maintained I would never fall for a cult before cobra, and look what happened. Although I wouldn't be in the job I'm in now if it wasn't for my year of purgatory.
If you've just been for your first interview with them and are reading this - I GAURANTEE you that you will be offered the job later today. Trust me. Just please don't take it.
PS I never ever wanted a BMW Z4, I just don't like them.
G
Belfast
United Kingdom
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